Eye of the Tigrrrrrr

Well, it’s 2014. And my posting on this blog in 2013 led a lot to be desired. I have conducted an investigation into the reasons for my lack of posting, and can present the following statistical breakdown of factors contributing to my underperformance:

  • 42% – Health issues
  • 18% – There was something on TV/ Pure laziness
  • 23% – Work deadlines
  • 17% – Moral qualms

Let me explain the last one.

I'm a Tigerrrrrrrr

I’m a Tigerrrrrrrr

Ever since the Bean’s diagnosis of autism, I have begun to worry that keeping this blog constitutes an invasion of her privacy. Well, not worry, but to stop rationalizing to myself that somehow it isn’t an invasion of her privacy. As she gets older and begins to have strong opinions about things (e.g.: “I don’t eat carrots. I am not a rabbit.”), it occurred to me that she might someday object to my writing about her on the Internet. This blog has never had more than about 200 unique readers, so it’s not as if she’s being broadcast to the entire world, but as it is out there online it is conceivable that someone, someday, might read something and embarrass her somehow with the information. Or, in an age of technologically-savvy stalkers, do worse than embarrass her.

There’s also an awareness of hypocrisy on my part. I’ve often scoffed at the kind of parents who treat their children like designer purses or pedigree dogs, to be shown off everywhere. Is what I’ve been doing with Bean much different than that, really? Many Americans are brought up in an environment that turns them into frustrated celebrities and compels them to use their offspring as bait for attention. So I worry that I, as a frustrated writer, am using my offspring as bait for attention to my writing.

Maybe I’m overthinking this. Maybe re-activating the blog would please my family, or maybe it could help me connect with other parents who have autistic children and so expand our support network.

You tell me.

Advertisements

5 comments

  1. Two conflicting views from me.
    1. The selfish:
    Can you protect some posts so they are only visible to a sub-group of visitors à la Facebook? I really value the insight into how she’s developing – and your writing.

    2. The Uncle:
    It’s Bean’s “story”. It is definitely worth recording, but maybe she should decide who sees it.

  2. Wow- food for thought for Pops!
    I love the updates, Grandmama has Facebook. (I won’t do it)
    Eve’s personality and accomplishments will over come any potential future issues. Her directness in dealing with these will only show the world how valuable she is. She will learn for herself who her true friends and soul mates are. Do what you think is in your heart !

  3. The questions you’re asking yourself are terribly important of course, but you never write about her without love and respect for who she is. I’m with Unka Simon however; involve her, let her know about the blog if she asks, be open. You are a writer after all, it’s what you do……she already knows that. Love you guys – Aunt Susan

  4. Completely understand your dilemma here, and if you didn’t ask yourself these questions then that’s the time to be worried. Perhaps now she’s older you could ‘anonymise’ the Blog. Switch all the names over to something less identifiable?? I suppose it’s what you want from the Blog in the bigger sense, and I suspect there are three or four reasons for writing one (as I am new to discovering myself). 1) Selfish Creative/Cathartic/Making Sense of it Outlet. 2) As reference for further writing work i.e just check out my Blog if you want to see how I write. 3) Informing friends and family of Eve’s progress. 4) Helping and touching other parents who are having or have had similar experiences. 1) 3) and 4) are actually good enough reasons to go on, but I’d consider taking your surnames and identifiables out of the equation in future. Must say, your love for Eve always shines through, and that she may treasure having that evidence when she is older. Vikki xx

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s